Nigella has a new tv show, it’s called Nigellissima, just wanted to let you guys know
I was obsessed with this special in high school
Bitch so fat she gotta rest her FUPA on the sink
More like fu-perfect
Alright, now I’ve got the next five days off.
Anyone wanna hang out?
Dude sitting next to me eating a massive bag of M&M’s just said “I’m not a FAN of Nelson Mandela”. The only other thing I’ve ever heard him talk about is video games.
Why does anyone ever talk to me?
Last night’s dreams were very boring so I’d like to make a request to my brain for tonight’s:
I run a 1940’s detective agency with my partner Ginger Spice circa 1996 and despite palpable sexual tension and a madcap series of goof-ups we convince Geena Davis to hold on to that ball so Rockford wins.